Lost Girl Reviews: Season 5, Episode 3

Lost GirlEpisode 3: Big in Japan

This one starts with Bo doing a little redecorating in the crap shack. She’s slapping some bilious green paint on one of the pillars when Dyson (shirtless, of course) starts mansplaining that she should use a bigger roller and prime the wall first. He puts the moves on her, but for some reason she’s not into it, even though he assuresredecoration her there are no strings attached. She makes an excuse and leaves him holding the tiny paint roller. At the Dal, a guy is singing a karaoke version of “Ring My Bell” (which Trick doesn’t seem to appreciate at all) with a couple of hot girls. Another guy is watching him and slips some kind of fish into his drink while he’s distracted, but the karaoke dude figures it out and doesn’t drink the sabotaged cocktail.

At Lauren’s lab, she and Dyson examine a dead human who was killed in an elevator Lauren threatenedaccident. There’s Fae blood on the human, just as there was on two other victims. There are no other clues (the humans were in perfect health, aside from being dead), so Lauren says she’ll  analyze the blood and try to figure out what kind of Fae it belongs to. Lauren gets a phone call that turns out to be a death threat—not the first one she’s received. Dyson says she should take precautions; she found a way to remove Fae powers and used it on the Morrigan, which has a lot of Fae either scared or greedy to use her discovery as a weapon. She asks about Bo and we learn Bo has been renovating since Kenzi left. Probably her way of keeping busy, or maybe she’s trying for the whole “fresh start” thing.

At home, Bo is doing online research to figure out why her sex drive has crashed, when Tamsin walks in with booze and snacks. The snacks are apparently quite revolting (Bo:picked up “It’s like eating a burp out of a frat boy’s mouth”), and Tamsin wonders how Kenzi used to make good appetizers out of the crap food they had on hand. Bo avoids the subject of Kenzi (again) and says they should go out to eat. They stop for a hot dog and the dude who was singing karaoke earlier pulls up in a fancy car and tries to pick them up. Tamsin’s into it, but Bo hesitates at first, wondering if the guy might be a serial killer. She changes her mind and decides to go with him to a club and Tamsin says she’s in too, as long as she can drive his car.

At Lauren’s lab, her assistants leave for the night and Lauren gets all paranoid. She’s wake up calleven more freaked out when the lights go out and she hears noises. She grabs a broom (“I warn you, I’m armed, and I’m … I’m toned!”), but it just turns out to be the janitor. Bo and Tamsin wake up in bed the next morning (no, they didn’t bang) hung over as hell. Bo sees the dude from the night before (Musashi) sitting beside the bed twirling a knife. She pulls a much bigger knife from under her pillow and asks him what the hell he wants. Musashi says an assassin is trying to kill him and Tamsin advises him to get a bodyguard; he says he already has two.

At a sushi restaurant where Musashi’s sister, Tomoe, works as a waitress, he tells Bo and Tamsin that an assassin tried to kill him with a piranha in his drink. Tamsin says that’s the signature move of a guy called Big Tak’o. It turns out Musashi is famous for a great battle in FaeLauren needs some moves history and Tamsin kind of fangirls out over him. Bo wonders why someone wants him dead if he’s so revered; he shows them a scroll and it turns out Musashi is ascending to be king of his ancestors … basically a god. At Dyson’s place, Lauren comes in and asks him to train her in self-defense (after asking him to put on a shirt). He agrees and starts sparring with her, telling her life is going to get intense because of what she did to the Morrigan. Lauren is frustrated immediately and Dyson says they’ll do some tests to figure out what style of fighting suits her best. The idea of experimenting appeals to the science nerd in Lauren and she agrees.

seppukuBo and Tamsin are walking around with Musashi and he’s telling them he still has enemies from his centuries-old conflicts, when Big Tak’o leaps out of nowhere. He knocks Bo and Tamsin down (some bodyguards they turned out to be) and prepares to kill Musashi. But when big Tak’o sees a tattoo on Musashi’s collarbone and realizes who his victim is, he apologizes profusely and immediately commits seppuku as penance. Bo’s arm is injured and Tamsin says she can feed off her to heal, but Bo says she can’t. At Lauren’s lab, she stitches Bo’s arm the old-fashioned way andsexual healing they discuss Bo’s lack of sex drive. Lauren tries putting the moves on her, but that doesn’t work either. Lauren says there could be a lot of reasons why Bo isn’t interested in sex, like a major change in her life that’s distracting her … I wonder who that could refer to? Bo is freaked out but says she has to get back to Musashi’s case. Lauren warns her to be careful, since she can’t heal from injuries without being able to feed.

At the Dal, Bo has a conversation with Trick about sex which makes him really uncomfortable (I thought he was gong to choke on the word “orgasm”), but doesn’t Tomoe saves Boreassure her. Tamsin comes in with a photo they found on Big Tak’o and says one of Musashi’s brothers must be the one trying to kill him. Musashi claims the picture was taken at a family retreat, so nobody else would have it. Bo goes undercover as a masseuse to get information from one of the brothers, but because of her non-existent sex drive she can’t use her succubus powers. The brother gets pissed off at her questions and starts choking her, but he’s knocked out by his sister, Tomoe. Turns out Tomoe is the one who sent the assassin, but she claims she’s trying to help Musashi.

Tomoe says if Musashi tries to ascend, he’ll be turned into an akaname, some kind of demon that licks up crud in bathrooms. Tomoe says if someone is dishonest with their ancestors, they transform into the demon, and Musashi has been lying about his heroicTomoe tells the story warrior deeds in the past. Tomoe knew Big Tak’o would never kill Musashi, but she hoped he would scare Musashi into admitting the truth. But Musashi has lived the lie so long, he pretty much believes it himself. Tomoe won’t tell Bo who the real hero of the battles was, but says Musashi can be saved if he just admits to lying. Bo tells Tamsin about Musashi’s deception and his probable fate (though she says he’ll turn into an edamame instead of akaname). They head to the ascension ceremony to stop it.

Tomoe in tengu maskAt the ceremony, Bo and Tamsin show up dressed like ninja (Tamsin in a “Kill Bill” style jacket) and pound Musashi’s guards. Bo holds a sword to his throat, but the ceremony is interrupted again by someone in a red Tengu mask; it turns out to be Tomoe, who was the real hero of the old battles. Musashi says everyone assumed he was the hero and he never corrected them. Tomoe is proclaimed the true Exalted One and everyone pays homage to her. (Tamsin: “That’s right, bow down, bitches.”) At Dyson’s place, he’s teaching Lauren to throw shuriken (or shaken, to beLauren throws a shuriken precise), but she has trouble with the concept. She rattles off a litany of ways to defend herself with chemicals and Dyson says if she could apply the same passion to self-defense as does to science, she’d have it made. They discuss Bo and Dyson thinks Bo blames him for stopping her from saving Kenzi at the portal to Hel. But Lauren points out Bo blames herself, as always. She says Bo needs a friend more than a lover at the moment and lands a shaken dead centre on the target board. Dyson points out it works best when it comes from the gut.

At home, Bo is doing a Stuart Smalley affirmation in the mirror when Musashi shows up and stabs her in the gut for ruining his ascension. She crawls across the floor, but passes out before she can reach the phone. She drifts in and out of consciousness at Lauren’s tough lovelab, as Dyson begs her to feed off him and Lauren struggles to treat her wound the old-fashioned way. Bo wakes up, but Lauren says the internal damage is too much for her to repair, which freaks out Trick and Dyson. Tamsin decides to try some tough love and rips out Bo’s I.V., saying she might as well just die if that’s what she really wants. Bo says she’s tired of losing everyone she gets close to … Kenzi was the last straw. She’s afraid that being the Chosen One dooms her to end up alone, but the others reassure her they love her and they’re in it for the long haul. Her eyes glow blue and she tells everyone but Dyson to leave; it’s feeding time!

Tamsin and Lauren make awkward conversation in the next room as Bo and Dyson destroy the lab with their wild sex. Lauren tells Tamsin her blunt style is just what’sawkward needed sometimes and Tamsin gets all weepy. Bo goes to the sushi place where Musashi is now a waiter, working off his debt to the family. He begs Bo to kill him, but she says that would be the easy way out. He says he didn’t admit the truth because he was afraid of looking weak, but Bo tells him a leader needs to be strong and vulnerable. Musashi says she doesn’t know what it’s like to be chosen for greatness, but Bo says she does know … and it’s bullshit.

target practiceAt Lauren’s lab, some asshole pretending to be a patient holds a knife to her assistant’s throat and demands the stuff Lauren used to turn the Morrigan human. Lauren fills a syringe (with ketamine) and throws it into his neck, knocking him out. At home, Bo, Dyson, Tamsin, and Lauren hang out for movie night. Dyson urges Tamsin to quit the police force and work with Bo as a P.I. And Lauren tells Dyson she can’t figure out the Fae blood on the dead bodies. At Lauren’s lab, the dead woman (the same one from the elevator at the end of last episode) comes back to life and climbs off theliving dead girl slab. She stumbles around the lab, finds a photo of Bo and Lauren, and walks out. Elsewhere, Lauren’s assistant is getting ready for a date when the dead woman shows up at her place and asks if she can see her. When the assistant says yes, the formerly dead gal breaks her neck and uses her lipstick; she could’ve just asked to borrow it. We’ll see what’s up with this living dead girl next episode.