Superman #423 – “Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?” – Alan Moore/Curt Swan/George Perez
This is an imaginary story (but aren’t they all?) about Superman’s supposed death, or disappearance, or retirement, depending on how you look at it. The Superman comics were ending in anticipation of John Byrne’s reboot of the character and this (very famous) story is a way of saying farewell to the Silver Age Superman before his history was radically altered. It starts in 1997, with a reporter (Tim Crane) interviewing Lois Lane (who’s
now Lois Elliot) about Superman’s presumed demise ten years before. Lois tells him how Superman’s enemies had either wiped themselves out, vanished, or been defeated definitively, so Superman was devoting himself to scientific research. On returning from a space sojourn, Superman found a trail of destruction in Metropolis and was shocked to find out Bizarro was responsible. When he confronted Bizarro, the duplicate laid out a line of illogic about how he wanted to be Superman’s exact (imperfect) double, so he 
destroyed Bizarro World and came to Earth to kill a bunch of people, the opposite of Superman’s life so far. Bizarro finally used blue kryptonite to kill himself. Not long after, Clark Kent received a package in the WGBS studio that turned out to be some murderous toy robots sent by Toyman and Puzzler. The robots started blasting lasers all over the place, revealing Clark’s secret identity to everyone. Turns out they’d gotten Clark’s secret out of Pete Ross, torturing him to death to make him talk. Superman rounded them up
quickly, but wondered why his usually mild foes were turning into killers … and what that would mean to the villains who already were killers, like Luthor and Brainiac. Around the same time, Luthor tracked Brainiac’s head down in the Arctic (after Superman had pounded Brainiac to pieces) and Brainiac ended up taking over Luthor’s body, forcing him to start constructing a new ship so Brainiac could get revenge on Superman. A few days later, Metallo created hundreds of duplicates and had them attack the Galaxy Building, smashing it all to hell. Superman turned the giant planet model on the roof into a magnet to gather all the Metallos (who were later re-
humanized), but the destruction was already done. Superman realized his friends were targets and took them all to the Fortress of Solitude, where Krypto returned from space to help guard them. Brainiac (in his new ship) found Kryptonite Man rampaging through Metropolis and took him to the Fortress to attack Superman and his friends. Superman got a visit from the early Legion, including his cousin Supergirl, who was dead in the present. The Legionnaires were acting all sad and gave Superman a trophy as a memento; they obviously knew what was coming but couldn’t say anything. But Superman’s not stupid, so he pretty much figured out that his time was up.
Action #583 – “Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?” – Alan Moore/Curt Swan/Kurt Schaffenberger
Tim’s interview with Lois continues from the above issue, with Lois’s new husband (Jordan Elliot) coming in to say hi to Tim (and spout off about how Superman was nothing special compared to the ordinary working man). Lois tells Tim how Superman burned the key to the Fortress, in preparation for a siege by Brainiac/Luthor. They showed up soon after, but before Brainiac could devise a plan of attack, three members of the Legion of Super-Villains (Lightning Lord, Saturn Woman, and Cosmic King) appeared from the future to witness Superman’s defeat. Brainiac raised a
force shield around the Fortress (in anticipation of other heroes coming to Superman’s aid) and began shooting at the Fortress. Superman destroyed some of Brainiac’s weapons long-range, but couldn’t get too close because of Kryptonite Man, whose powers had somehow gotten much stronger. Other heroes (Batman, Wonder Woman, Captain Marvel, Superwoman, Vartox, among others) did arrive to help, but couldn’t get through the force shield. Inside, Jimmy and Lana decided to help Superman by raiding his museum for the formulae that turned him into Elastic Lad and gave Lana 
super-powers. Lana attacked the villains and Jimmy went after Brainiac’s force shield generator. With his last bit of will power, Luthor (abhorring being Brainiac’s slave) begged Lana to kill him, so she did. But Lightning lord ended up burning her to a crisp and Brainiac exerted control over Luthor’s corpse in time to kill Jimmy. Despite Jimmy’s sabotage, the force shield stayed up, powered by a source even Brainiac couldn’t identify. Brainiac took advantage of it to blast the Fortress, breaching a wall. Perry White saved his wife from some falling rocks and they finally reconnected. Krypto went after Kryptonite Man as soon as he entered the Fortress, killing him but at
the cost of Krypto’s life. (As the fight progresses, we get glimpses of some other Silver Age stuff, like Nightwing & Flamebird, Lori Lemaris, and a statue of an ape that might be Titano, or maybe that gorilla Jimmy almost married … figures Superman would keep a memento of that around for some laughs.) When Superman found out the Legion of Super-Villains killed Lana he freaked, ready to abandon his code against killing, which caused the villains to flee back to the future. Superman confronted Brainiac, but Luthor’s corpse finally 
became too much to maintain and collapsed, precipitating Brainiac’s end as well. Superman wondered at all the destruction and what was maintaining the force shield and finally realized the only villain unaccounted for was Mr. Mxyzptlk. Mxyzptlk appeared, looking a lot scarier than usual and explained how being immortal was boring as hell, so he’d spent millennia trying different ways to pass the time. He’d recently decided to become totally evil and admitted he was behind the sudden murderous turn Superman’s rogues had taken. As Mxyzptlk prepared to destroy Superman, Lois pointed out the trophy the Legionnaires had given him, where he was holding a Phantom Zone
projector. Taking that as a hint, Superman led Mxyzptlk to the projector and turned it on him, casing the imp to panic. Mxyzptlk spoke his name backwards to send himself back to his own dimension, but Superman turned on the projector at that exact moment, catching Mxyzptlk halfway between dimensions and tearing him apart. Wracked with guilt over taking a life, Superman walked into a room full of gold kryptonite (which permanently removes super-powers from Kryptonians) and Lois never saw him again. In 1997, Lois finishes 
her story by telling Tim how the other heroes entered the Fortress once the force shield came down and found a hidden exit from the gold kryptonite room. Everyone assumed the powerless Superman walked out into the Arctic to freeze to death (although it’s strange nobody went looking for him). Tim asks Lois if she thinks Superman might still be alive, but she says she’s sure he died that day in the Arctic. Tim heads back to Metropolis to write up his story, leaving Lois and Jordan (and their baby, Jonathan) to their happy family life. But we see that Jonathan can squeeze coal into diamonds, and the story ends with Jordan winking at the readers, so I guess Superman didn’t die that day in the Arctic after all. I’ve heard a lot about this story, but this is the first time I’ve read it.
It’s a great send off for the Man of Steel and Moore hits all the right notes, bringing back most of the Silver Age classics that made Superman so beloved for all those years.
DC Comics Presents #97 – “Phantom Zone: The Final Chapter” – Steve Gerber/Rick Veitch/Bob Smith
This is an untold pre-Crisis story that starts on Krypton, not too long before the planet’s destruction. Jor-El knows Krypton is doomed (although nobody will listen to his warnings), so he’s been searching for an escape. He invents a dimensional projector, hoping it will send him and Lara (who’s very pregnant) to another dimension where they’ll be safe. But when Jor-El tests the projector, he finds himself in the Phantom Zone, a place of nothingness that nevertheless seems to almost have a soul of its own … and that soul resents Jor-El’s intrusion into its perfect sanctuary. Jor-El almost
gets trapped in the Zone, but Lara rescues him and he offers the projector as a way to exile criminals (the old method being to freeze them and shoot them into orbit). Cha-Kor, the tech in charge of using the projector, reflects on some of the convicts he’s exiled: Jax-Ur, Va-Kox, Xadu, Faora, Nam-Ek, and General Zod, who he’d served under in the Defense Corps. Cha-Kor also relates how Jor-El personally projected his cousin (Kru-El) into the Zone for building and using forbidden weapons. Zod marshals the other Zone exiles for a telepathic attack on Jor-El that almost succeeds, so the projector is launched into space. In Krypton’s Valley of Juru (an unexplored region since it’s resistant 
to technology), a wizard named Thul-Kar knows of Krypton’s imminent destruction and projects himself to the Phantom Zone. After Krypton’s destruction, Thul-Kar communes with the Zone’s psyche (which he calls Aethyr) and ends up being somewhat subservient to it. When Mxyzptlk is sentenced to be imprisoned in a cell that negates his powers, Thul-Kar contacts him and offers to free him if Mxyzptlk is willing to let Aethyr use his body for a while. Mxyzptlk agrees and (after destroying those who sentenced him) heads for the third dimension. The destruction of Bizzaro World gets Mxyzptlk’s attention and he sends Bizarro’s head crashing into the Galaxy Building just as Clark and
Lana finish their newscast. Clark changes to Superman and ruins into Mxyzptlk above Metropolis. Mxyzptlk is bringing a kryptonite meteor down on the city, so Superman ignores the pain the kryptonite causes him and smashes the meteorite. Unfortunately, the “meteorite” was actually Argo City and by smashing it, Superman has killed the entire population. He realizes Mxyzptlk has changed and the imp admits he’s given his mind over to someone else. Aethyr wants to use Mxyzptlk to free himself from the Zone and become corporeal, but changes his mind at the last minute, absorbing Mxyzptlk instead. But Thul-Kar and the other Zone villains are freed and Zod leads 
most of them in an attack on Earth. Superman is still pissed off about destroying Argo City, so he pounds the shit out of the villains. Faora gives him some trouble, but Mxyzptlk has melded with Aethyr (and basically taken over its mind), so he saves Superman’s life before heading back to his own dimension. For all intents and purposes, Mxyzptlk is pretty much a god now, which gives him the last laugh on Superman. This is the last Superman story before Byrne’s reboot and the last one I’ll be reviewing (except for the Annual, which I’ll do after all the regular issues, as usual), since my post-Crisis list is long enough without adding the Superman titles to it. In two weeks, I’ll be reviewing All-Star Squadron and Infinity Inc here alongside JLA just to balance things out until the end of 1986.
JLA #254 – “Desperate” – Gerry Conway/Luke McDonnell/Bill Wray
Last issue, Despero invaded Earth and captured the new JLA, turning New York into a hellscape and demanding the original JLA surrender to him. Batman figured out that Despero’s rebirth in the Flame of Py’tar on Kalanor left him with a link to the Flame, an offshoot of which Despero has brought to Earth. Batman told Vixen he’d keep Despero busy while she and the others destroyed the Flame, hopefully making Despero vulnerable. But when Vixen went to find her teammates, they were already unconscious from Despero’s earlier attack. As Batman engages Despero in a fight he can’t possibly win, Vixen revives the others and fills
them in on what’s happening. Vibe is ready to walk away, saying they have no chance against a heavy-hitter like Despero, but the others agree to try and Vibe finally joins them. Despero captures Batman, pinning him to a stone wall where he’s tormented by conjured demons. While the others distract Despero, Vixen frees Batman and they all attack Despero’s minions. J’onn tells Vibe his powers can disrupt the Flame, but Vibe is still skeptical. As the others fight the demons, Gypsy tries to sneak Steel through invisibly, but Despero blasts him. Gypsy gets pissed off and uses her “nightmare” power to make 
Despero see himself being consumed by the Flame of Py’tar instead of reborn. Despero freaks, summoning all his power to banish the illusion, which gives Vibe the opportunity to blast the Flame. Vibe’s power snuffs the Flame, forcing Despero to feed on himself, which snuffs him out too. New York goes back to normal and Batman congratulates Vibe, who realizes he’s not so useless after all.