G.I. Joe Reviews: G.I. Joe 3, G.I. Joe 4

G.I. Joe 3 coverG. I. Joe #3 (September 1982) – “The Trojan Gambit” – Larry Hama/Herb Trimpe/Jack Abel, Jon D’Agostino

This one starts with the aftermath of a battle between the Joes and Cobra, in which the Joes have captured a Cobra stronghold and everything inside, including a sophisticated battle robot. The robot is dismantled and taken to the Pit, the Joes’ secret headquarters under the Chaplain’s Assistants’ Motor Pool at Fort Wadsworth. (And from the title of this story, you can probably guess what’s going to happen.) Hawk and Scarlett change into dress uniforms to attend a social tea above HQ, while Steeler, Clutch, and Breaker analyze the robot parts to make surerobot assembles itself they’re not booby-trapped. Everything is negative so they break for lunch, but Cobra’s engineers are better than the Joes imagined. A chemical timer in the robot’s hand activates and the hand uses the Pit computer to bring down various blast doors, trapping the Joes in whatever room they happen to be. The hand then begins reassembling the robot. In the canteen, Steeler uses sheer muscle to lift the counterweight on the blast door, freeing himself, Breaker, and Clutch. In the armory, Flash has to use his laser rifle on low power to fighting the robotburn through the locking mechanism without killing himself, Stalker, and Snake Eyes. Clutch realizes something weird is going on and leads Steeler and Breaker back to the computer room, where the fully assembled robot tries to blast them. The robot is programmed to get into the open and transmit a signal so Cobra will know where Joe headquarters is. Clutch douses the robot with aftershave and lights it on fire, but it puts itself out in the swimming pool. The robot survives falling down the elevator shaft and avoids being crushed by a falling field artillery piece. Clutch and the others douse it with paint to blindtaking out bugs its visual receptors and use aluminum foil to screw up its RADAR, so the robot falls back down to the lower level and breaks apart again. But the head sprouts tentacles and tries to climb back up, until Flash blasts it. Now the head releases a dozen small insect-like robots which try to exit headquarters to send a signal. The Joes manage to smash all the “bugs”, with Scarlett stepping on the last one just as it reaches ground level.

 

G. I. Joe 4 coverG.I. Joe #4 (October 1982) – “Operation: Wingfield” – Larry Hama/ Herb Trimpe/Jack Abel, Jon D’Agostino

This one starts with the Joe team viewing video of a self-styled paramilitary survivalist named Vance Wingfield. Wingfield runs a survivalist camp where he teaches recruits to prepare for the downfall of society … or something. Wingfield doesn’t fuck around, as he uses live fire training exercises and doesn’t care whether the recruits get hurt, even ignoring his wife’s objections. The Joes are interested because Wingfield’s operation may be funded by Cobra, so Hawk and Grunt go in as new recruits to check things out, while Snake Eyes stays outside to observe the camp. While Hawk andobserving the camp Grunt struggle to pretend they’re not elite soldiers during the training regimen, Snake Eyes observes some surplus planes, one of which might be capable of delivering a nuke. Late at night, Hawk and Grunt snoop around to check out the armory, while Snake Eyes sneaks in to check the bomber but gets sidetracked spying on a meeting between Wingfield and his top people. Wingfield has decided to launch a nuke (provided by Cobra) at Vladivostok, trying to provoke World War III, so he and his survivalists can take over once the Americans and Soviets annihilate each other. In case the first strike pounding soldiersdoesn’t work, there’s another nuke buried under the camp which Wingfield can detonate to sucker the Americans into thinking the USSR bombed the United States. That would probably start the war Wingfield wants, although none of them would be around to see it. Hawk and Grunt find Russian T-60 tanks in the armory (obviously supplied by Cobra), but they trip a silent alarm. Wingfield sends guards to subdue them and after a hell of a fight, they’re taken prisoner. Wingfield decides to move up the schedule on his big plan. Snake Eyes takes out the radio operator and sends a message to the Joes about the situation. He then rescues Hawk and Grunt and tells them about Wingfield’s plan. Hawk goes after the bomber that’s just taken off, leaving Grunt andHawk takes down bomber Snake Eyes to take on Wingfield’s men. They box them up in one building and when Hawk shoots down the bomber, Wingfield activates the nuke under the camp. His recruits realize how crazy he is and start turning on him, and when he threatens to kill them, his wife shoots him. She tells the Joes about the nuke that’s going off in ten minutes, but says Wingfield was the only one who could disarm it. But Zap quickly figures out the mechanism and—with a little help from Grunt—saves the day. This was a pretty good story, and rather prescient since the whole “survivalist” thing wasn’t really as big in 1982 as it would disarming the nukelater become. (Wingfield’s camp is even in Montana!) Wingfield is a typical paramilitary nutcase, but his dialogue during training reminds me of R. Lee Ermey in Full Metal Jacket. Maybe all drill instructors sound the same. It’s also nice to see the Joes fight someone besides Cobra, although they were apparently the ones supplying Wingfield with all the heavy artillery.