Lost Girl Reviews: Season 3, Episode 1

Lost GirlEpisode 1: Caged Fae

This one starts with Bo (looking pretty funky) walking through a dark alley carrying a big satchel. A couple of dudes corner her and she kicks their asses, but not before getting sliced in the face. She heads to a nightclub, drains some dude to heal her face, and tosses handfuls of money at the crowd out front. Soon after, she’s running down a different alley, being chased by someone—or something. She runs inside the Dal, followed closely by a pissed off Dyson.

Bo hauled off
“I’m Bo, bitches … and I’ll be back.”

They tangle a bit and Dyson mentions Bo has broken pretty much every Fae law lately. So, I guess the whole “controlling her Dark side” thing isn’t really working out? Kenzi is concerned, but Trick refuses to grant sanctuary. Dyson says he’s taking Bo in and hauls her off as she gives everyone a parting message.

We now see Bo being booked into prison; apparently, she stole a lotta shit but she wants the guards to know the vibrator is all hers. The other prisoners are lined up to check her out, including one who looks like Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS. Yeah, in case the title (or the form-fitting prison warden watchinggarb) didn’t tip you off, this is obviously going to be a play on those “women in prison” movies from the 70s. Bo is taken to her cell and she tries to use her succubus mojo on the guard, but it doesn’t work. She meets her cellmate, Sylvie, who stole bread to feed her family. (Bo: “So you’re Jean Valjean?”; Sylvie: “I’m Sylvie … we just met.”) Sylvie tells Bo the guards are Amazons, who hate men (especially the new Ash) and abandon their male babies in the woods. Bo is taken to the infirmary where she’s supposed to work with the doctor. Of course, the doctor turns out to be Lauren, pretending to be all tough and surly.

We finally find out what’s going on, for those who haven’t already figured it out: Bo is undercover, investigating the prison which is rife with corruption. Lauren is there because the previous prison doctor was her mentor, who tutored her in how to work with Fae. But the mentor disappeared and Lauren can’t believe she’d just take off and leave all herinfirmary patients (i.e. the prisoners) without care. Lauren is passing as a Fae by smearing herself with Skunk Ape musk (yum) and gives Bo some kind of stone that she says will protect her. They’re interrupted by the warden, who’s the  bondage leather-babe we saw earlier. She throws around some threats and sexual innuendo (as you do) and says she wants Bo reassigned .. to clean her office. I foresee some sexy escapades coming up.

At the Dal, Kenzi is freaking out and storms into the back to see the new Kenzi worriedAsh … who turns out to be Hale. Yeah, Hale. Anyway, it looks like Bo’s crime spree was all faked just to get her inside the prison and now Kenzi’s worried about Bo being undercover (or “tits deep in enemy territory” as she puts it) with no back-up except Lauren. Hale says Lauren’s highly competent, but Kenzi’s not convinced. (Kenzi: “When shit gets real, what is she gonna do, science people to death?”) Kenzi’s worried about Bo and worries even more when she finds out the prison is built over Ley Lines that take away the prisoners’ Fae powers. Dyson says the stone Lauren gave Bo is a sarsen stone to counteract the Ley Lines; all the guards have sarsen stones too. We findDyson and Kenzi out Hale is only the acting Ash and exposing the corruption at the prison would be a great way to show the Elders he knows what he’s doing. But the Amazons won’t listen to anything he has to say (Kenzi: “Because of your stupid penis?”; Hale: “I prefer ‘untested leadership’”.), hence the subterfuge. Dyson tries to assure Kenzi everything will be fine.

We see Bo scrubbing the warden’s office, wearing an outfit that’s sexy maiddefinitely not prison-issue. After some more sexual innuendo, the head guard shows up and she and the warden go into the inner office, which is protected by a retinal scanner. The guard gives the warden a flask of some weird chemical and asks if the subject is ready for treatment yet. The warden says almost, but when the guard questions how long she’s going to keep doing … whatever the hell she’s doing, the warden gives her a slap. She says everything she does is for the good of the Amazons. Later, Sylvie gives Bo a tour of the yard (which is actually inside) and they see a girl who’d been released getting dragged back. Sylvie says she’s getting out in three days (which probably means she’s doomed) and the head guard starts roughing her up. Bo defends herpat down and she and the guard fight. Bo uses her succubus powers, but gets jumped by the other guards and dragged off. She’s hosed down (of course) and the warden starts giving her a sexy pat-down. She finds the sarsen stone and knows Bo has help on the inside. Bo tries a kiss, but with her powers now gone, the warden isn’t too impressed. She orders the guards to kick the shit out of Bo, but stay away from the face (“I want her pretty.”)

Lauren finds a shit-kicked Bo, who wants Lauren to get out while she can. Lauren says she found papers showing that her ex-mentor has been injecting Fae with some weird drug cocktail before they’re released. She says half of them disappear and half re-offend but come back broken, Bo and Lauren talkwith no spirit left. She can’t believe her mentor would do that willingly, so she’s staying until she finds out what’s going on. The tension between Lauren and Bo is palpable and it’s obvious Lauren’s now ready for a relationship, but Bo’s hesitating. Maybe she’s still hung up on Dyson, but as far as she knows, he can never love again, so I’m not sure what her problem is. (In case you can’t tell, I’m Team Lauren.) Lauren says Dyson is supposed to get something to the prison that’ll help them, but she doesn’t seem to have much faith in him.

At the police station, Vex is being a pain in the ass, as usual. He’s bugging Dyson about not having a partner since Hale became acting Ash, but Dyson says he works better alone. Vex lets it slip that none f the prisoners released from Hecuba are ever heard from again. Dyson’s pissed off thatVex and dyson Vex didn’t mention it before, but Vex keeps up his annoying behaviour. It almost seems like he’s angling for a friend; he seems a tad flirty as well, but that’s kinda his normal register. We also find out Vex is still staying at Bo and Kenzi’s. Wow, Bo really is a soft touch. At the prison, Bo and Sylvie say goodbye as Sylvie is released. At the Dal, Kenzi gets the mysterious package from Dyson, since she’s the one delivering it. (Kenzi: “No wangs allowed.”; Dyson: “Face of an angel, soul of a poet.”)

We next see Kenzi all tarted up pretending to be Bo’s girlfriend on visiting Kenzi smooches Boday. The guards notices she’s human, but Kenzi says “the shorter the life-span, the deeper the quicksand.” She’s taken in to see Bo, who’s slightly amused (or bemused) by her appearance. (Bo: “You wore your redneck wig.”; Kenzi: “And my monster truck thong; go Method or go home.”) They chat for a bit and we learn Kenzi still has that weird rash on her arm, though she tries to play it off as no big deal. She gives Bo a big smooch and gets dragged off, leaving Bo to extract something from her mouth. I think Houdini and his wife used theretinal scanner same trick when he escaped from Alcatraz. Later, Bo is scrubbing the warden’s office again (though not in her sexy maid outfit this time) and tells the guard she’s almost done. The guard goes to get the warden and Bo pulls out the thing Kenzi passed her, which turns out to be a contact lens so she can get past the retinal scanner on the warden’s inner office.

She gets in and searches the place, finding a hidden door. Behind it, there Sylvie pregnantare shelves of the chemical flasks we saw earlier and a door labeled “Solitary Confinement”. Bo goes in and finds an unopened flask on the stairs and a rather domestic scene below. Sylvie is there, but Bo is startled to find she’s now very pregnant. Sylvie says she just woke up pregnant in the “apartment”, but there are cameras everywhere and she knows they’ll be coming for her baby as soon as it’s born. Speaking of which, her water breaks and Bo takes her to see Lauren in the infirmary. Lauren finds out Sylvie is a Wanblee, a Fae with a highly developed sense of smell. Lauren starts stripping and explains she has to wash off the Skunk Ape musk or the baby will blow up like a balloon. Bo’s worried Lauren will be exposed as human, but Lauren says she can’t abandon a patient.no pants Lauren

At the police station, Kenzi and Vex (who’s dressed as some kind of bondage stripper cop) come to harangue Dyson about Bo. He’s examiningbondage cop crime scene reports about Lauren’s ex-mentor, who was found in numerous pieces. Kenzi’s freaked and wants to get Bo out of the prison. In the infirmary, Sylvie’s baby is born (with help from Lauren’s new assistant, Jobina) and Bo and Lauren have a “domestic” moment; turns out Lauren already has baby names in mind. Before Sylvie can hold her son, the warden shows up and says the baby is hers. Turns out the warden has been fake-releasing prisoners, impregnating them (with sperm from a Liderc, a Fae that knocks women up without their knowledge), and selling the Fae babies on the black market. The warden zaps Lauren with a taser stick and says she’s going to kill Bo—after she breeds her, since an unaligned succubus baby will be worth a hell of a lot.

crotch grab
That’s not a knife …

At the Dal, Kenzi and Dyson tell Hale about the dead doctor and Hale says he got a garbled call for help from the prison infirmary. Dyson and Kenzi head for the prison. Inside, Bo and the others are being marched to their doom. The warden says Lauren’s mentor found out what was going on and was going to stop it, so she had her guards tear her apart. Now they’ll do the same to Lauren as Bo watches. Jobina grabs a guard to give Bo a shot at fighting back and Bo zaps another guard then grapples with the warden. She dragged off, but tells everyone the warden is actually a dude. She (or he, rather) is the Liderc that’s been impregnating the girls. The head guard does the old Crocodile Dundee crotch-grab and knows Bo is right. The Liderc says his mother was anBo and Lauren kiss Amazon and he was just trying to give the male babies a chance to lie, but the guards drag him off and (most likely) rip him into pieces. Bo releases the prisoners and she and Lauren decide to give their relationship a real shot … finally! They smooch it up and Dyson and Kenzi show up just in time to see it. Dyson notes how happy Bo looks.

At the Dal, Bo shows them pictures of Sylvie’s baby, which has feathers. (Trick: “Wanblees get cuter after their first molting.”) We learn the Liderc somehow survived the Amazons’ wrath. Hale says he’s pardoned all but the most violent offenders and shut down the prison. Bo’s ready to go see Lauren (her “girlfriend”), but Trick wonders if she’s okay. Bo says her drainfather is definitely Dark Fae and wonders what kind of influence that might have on her. Trick assures her that she’s not a monster and she heads out to see Lauren. Outside, Bo passes some dude and grabs him, draining him with her powers. She walks away, her eyes getting the evil look we’ve seen before. So, I guess her Dark side isn’t completely suppressed. We’ll see where that goes in upcoming episodes.

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