This one starts at a police station in Boone, Wisconsin where a wild-looking dude (Purcell) comes running in to confess to shooting someone in a robbery gone bad. The cops are all shocked, since Purcell’s lawyer had gotten his case dismissed on a technicality, but they’re not willing to look a gift horse in the mouth. A detective named Briggs cuffs Purcell and takes his confession. Later, Purcell’s lawyer is talking to the District Attorney (Hofgren) and questions the validity of Purcell’s confession since all the witnesses were cops who were pissed off about having to cut him loose in the first place. A forensic technician comes in to take evidence from Purcell and it turns out to be H.G. Wells … although she’s back to using the name Emily Lake. Wells says there was insufficient original evidence to prove Purcell was involved in the shooting, although she does believe he’s guilty. As she takes his DNA and a fingernail swab, Wells notices hair on Purcell’s knuckles that disappears right in front of her eyes and some changes in his facial features. She figures there may be an artifact at work.
At the Warehouse, Artie is relaxing in a hammock when the whole place starts shaking. The others are having breakfast at the boardinghouse and Claudia is obviously nervous having Abigail around, since Abigail is a therapist and Claudia was institutionalized for quite a while. Artie calls to ask if they felt the earthquake, and when he learns they didn’t he tells them to meet him at the FISH. (That’s a cloaking and monitoring device for the Warehouse.) Claudia remembers getting zapped in the ass by a random lightning bolt last episode, but doesn’t mention it, much to Steve’s surprise. Before they can head over, Myka gets a call from Wells. She and Pete head straight to Wisconsin, where Myka acts all hurt that Wells hasn’t been in touch. Yup, there’s still some sexual tension there. Wells says after she returned the astrolabe she was done with artifacts and wanted a quieter life, so she became a forensic expert in Boone. She tells them about Purcell and that he kind of transformed while she was examining him. (Pete: “Transforming how? Like, dangerous, Jekyll and Hyde or werewolf … Roseanne Barr?”)
At the Warehouse, Artie checks the FISH (which looks like a flying saucer from a cheap 50s movie) and finds that the Warehouse definitely moved, but the ground and mountains around it didn’t. They head inside to check the Warehouse for clues. Claudia is still weirded out having Abigail around, but before she can get too worked up the Warehouse starts shaking again. Claudia gets hit by another lightning bolt, but nobody else notices. In Wisconsin, Myka is all worked up about Wells trying to deny who she is and have a normal life. Pete says maybe she just doesn’t want to end up evil, crazy, or dead. They talk to Purcell, who tells them he was involved in the robbery but has no idea why he suddenly confessed. He says his supposed partner (Schultz) really is innocent but can’t say what his alibi is. Pete wonders if they’re dealing with an irony artifact, but when Myka asks Purcell what he was doing right before his confession, the very memory freaks the hell out of him. We see Schultz in a dark room, freaking out and swearing he wasn’t involved in the robbery, but his face is all distorted, almost Neanderthal in appearance.
Later, Schultz is found dead, supposedly from a heart attack. Pete and Myka talk to D.A. Hofgren about the case, mentioning that Schultz was in a bar fight in another state at the time of the robbery, so he definitely wasn’t there. Hofgren says Schultz had a hell of a record and doesn’t appreciate their interference in his case. He threatens to arrest them if they don’t back off. They call Artie to ask about fear-based artifacts, but there are hundreds of them. Since Wells only saw Purcell later, Artie asks about how Purcell looked when he first confessed and says they should check the police station video. Pete wonders if the family of the guy Purcell shot might be seeking revenge, so Myka tells him to check that angle and she’ll try to get a look at the police video.
At the Warehouse, Abigail suggests using geological survey sensors to pinpoint the seismic activity, but there aren’t any near the Warehouse. Claudia gets another lightning bolt in the ass and still nobody notices, but now she’s really getting freaked out by it. Artie tweaks Abigail’s idea a bit, using the internal monitors to figure out where the tremors originate … Yukon Sector. When they get there, they find a huge energy storm below the ceiling shooting out energy all over the place. Artie sees the expansion joints are jammed by something, which is causing all the trouble. (Yeah, the Warehouse automatically expands to make room for new artifacts; makes sense, I guess.)
In Wisconsin, Myka goes to see Wells and gets a shock … Wells is living with some dude (Nate) and his daughter (Adelaide). Wells has been teaching Adelaide to be observant and she sees right away that Wells and Myka are close friends. Wells tells Myka she wanted to get away from all the crazy Warehouse bullshit and just have a nice, quiet life. Myka looks kinda jealous, but says they need Wells’s help to get a look at the police video … and Wells did call them, so maybe she’s up for one more adventure after all. They go to the police station and are stopped by a sergeant. Wells implies that Myka’s her girlfriend (not exactly a stretch) and she’s trying to impress her with a tour of the station. The sergeant thinks that’s kinda hot, so he lets them go about their business.
They check the video and see that Purcell was really devolved, almost Neanderthal, right before he came into the cop shop. Pete calls to say the family isn’t looking for revenge but a cop named Briggs came by and creeped them out with a bunch of talk about vengeance. Wells checks the video and they see that Briggs had his cuffs out before Purcell came in, so he obviously knew what was about to happen. Myka tells Pete the crazed killer with an artifact is a cop. They check Briggs’s house, but he’s not there. They call Artie and he says it must be an artifact that affects the limbic system—the fight or flight response—and is turning the victims into a primal state. He says the artifact could be really old and really powerful and its downside will be powerful too, maybe putting the wielder into a predatory state of mind permanently.
They search Briggs’s house and see that he has a file on Wells (well, on Emily Lake). At Wells’s place, Briggs shows up and asks Nate a bunch of questions about Wells, Pete , and Myka. Briggs tells Nate that Wells is hiding something and pulls out the artifact, a piece of prehistoric skull. He tells Nate that Pete and Myka better back off or he’ll ruin Nate and Wells’s perfect little life. Wells comes out and beats the shit out of Briggs, but gets distracted when she sees Nate is devolving. Briggs takes off just as Pete and Myka show up and bag the artifact, putting Nate back to normal.
At the Warehouse, Artie says something is keeping the joints from expanding and explains that the Warehouse is a self-sustaining system that converts energy to matter and vice versa. Abigail figures out that since the joints can’t expand, they’re spewing energy all over the place because it has nowhere else to go, so they have to stop the flow of energy until they can figure out what’s jamming the joints. (Claudia: “Most people take a little longer till they’re comfortable speaking in Freakinese.”) Steve suggests they should shoot some neutralizer goo up over the joists to block the Warehouse energy. Claudia gets zapped in the ass again and she and Steve go off to build a goo shooter.
This time Steve noticed her getting zapped and asks her about it. Claudia says she’s been getting hit with lightning since they got back from England; she figures the Warehouse is mad at her for stabbing Artie, so she wants to be careful. Steve suggests she tell Artie, but she doesn’t want to say anything in front of Abigail. Steve thinks it’s strange to worry about sounding crazy when they work in Crazytown, but Claudia reminds him she got locked up for saying her brother was trapped in another dimension … even though she was right. Another bolt hits her and she falls against a shelf, knocking a grenade into her hand. Meanwhile, Artie has figured out what’s jamming the expansion joists … a spike from the Transcontinental Railway that draws things together.
In Wisconsin, Pete figures out that the skull bone is from a prehistoric hyena that preyed on humans. Nate is worked up about Wells keeping secrets, but Pete says Wells is a great person and she’ll definitely look after Nate and Adelaide. Myka asks Wells why she fell for a guy with a daughter about the same age as Christina (Wells’s dead daughter). Myka asks if Wells is really happy here and says Wells shouldn’t deny who she is to chase after a ghost. They get a call from Briggs, who’s grabbed Adelaide from her karate class. He wants the hyena jawbone back or Adelaide is dead; he says he’ll text Nate the details of where to bring the artifact. Nate freaks out and Pete tries to talk to him. Wells says Myka was right and that she can’t run away from the Warehouse; it sticks with her and brings misery to everything she touches. Wells is ready to go kill Briggs, but Myka takes off instead with the artifact and Nate’s cell. She tells Pete it’s her fault since she dragged Wells into all this, so she’ll take care of Briggs and get Adelaide back.
At the Warehouse, Claudia comes up with an RPG that shoots goo rockets (the Goozooka), but Steve’s first shot can’t get through the energy maelstrom to hit the joists. He tries to climb higher on a diving platform, but slips and gets stuck halfway up. Artie sprains his ankle, so it’s up to Claudia and Abigail to blast the joists with the RPG; Claudia’s not exactly thrilled about being forced to work with Abigail. In Wisconsin, Pete tells Nate they’ll get his daughter back. He also mentions that Wells lost a daughter, but Nate says he’d sensed that she’d lost someone. Pete figures Briggs’s hideout must be near the police station, since Purcell was still devolved when he came in. Wells finds tracks from brand-new hiking boots outside and a price tag that’s marked down. Nate mentions a camping goods store near the police station that just went out of business. Pete has bad news from his research … hyenas hunt in packs. Briggs made it back to the station before Purcell was released, so he must have a partner, but Myka doesn’t know that.
At the camping store, Myka tries to give Briggs the jawbone in exchange for Adelaide, but she’s surprised by Briggs’s partner … D.A. Hofgren. Myka realizes Hofgren is the alpha dude and that he killed Schultz by scaring him to death with the artifact. Hofgren admits it and says he’s going to kill her and Adelaide to keep them quiet. She appeals to Briggs, saying he used to be a good cop. Briggs says he still is and Myka says good cops don’t kill little kids. She tells Briggs about Schultz’s alibi, which Hofgren never mentioned. While they’re arguing, Myka decks them both and takes off.
At the Warehouse, Claudia finally admits to Abigail that she’s worried the Warehouse hates her and she didn’t want word to get back to the Regents because it might jeopardize her chance at being Caretaker … and she’s just realized that she really wants to be Caretaker. Abigail says she’s no snitch and points out that if Claudia has a connection to the Warehouse, maybe all the zapping is its way of asking her for help. Abigail says if Claudia wants to be Caretaker she better get in the thick of it and caretake. Claudia walks into the energy storm—completely unharmed—and blasts the goo rocket up to the joist. The neutralizer covers the joist, stopping the energy storm and allowing the joists to expand properly. The railway spike drops into Claudia’s hand and she struts back to Abigail totally covered in purple goo while Pink’s “Trouble” plays in the background. (Claudia: “I’m gonna need a Silkwood shower.”)
In Wisconsin, Pete and Wells get to the camping store and split up. Pete reminds Wells not to kill Briggs or Myka will be super-pissed. Myka finds the room Adelaide is in but hears Pete yelling at Hofgren and goes to help. Wells kicks Briggs’s ass and runs into Myka, who tells her where Adelaide is. Pete jumps Hofgren, who uses the artifact to freak Pete out and devolve him. Myka Teslas Hofgren and bags the artifact, bringing Pete back to normal before he dies of fright. Wells finds Adelaide, who’s a pretty resourceful kid … she’s gotten loose from her bonds and is ready to bash her captors with an iron bar. Wells tells Adelaide her real name is Helena.
At the Warehouse, Claudia seems a bit more relaxed with Abigail (especially when she tells Claudia she only uses electro-shock cables on her car, not on people) and Claudia notices the smell of apples. That’s significant, because in Warehouse 12, Wells smelled apples and Katuranga said it meant the Warehouse liked her. In Wisconsin, Pete and Myka say goodbye to Wells. Myka says she was wrong and that Wells should fight to keep Nate and Adelaide. Myka says Wells is good at caring about people, so she shouldn’t stop doing it. She also admits she was afraid of losing Wells as a friend, but Wells says that’ll never happen. (Wells: “Maybe just coffee next time?”; Myka: “Or save the world … see what happens.”) I was hoping they’d finally admit their feelings for each other, but I guess that’d be tacky with Wells’s boyfriend just inside the house. The way things end here, I wonder if this was meant to be Wells’s last appearance? She does appear again though, so maybe not.